• Ah…The Joys of her Chat!

    by  • May 28, 2011 • Daily Matters, Life • 3 Comments

    I know forehand what you are thinking: Chat Rooms!

    Sorry to disappoint you, NOT!

    It is your daily chat with each individual you meet: Small Talk, Chitchat, Chatter, Mini converse and Gossip. You name it; and if it involves any kind of talk; women are the masters of it.

    It is not that women talk more than men; which is not true according to a study by Psychologist Campbell Leaper of the University of California Santa Cruz; It is in the How they carry out their conversations from start to finish. here is an interesting scenario:

    Put a man in a social setting, his mission is simple: “Find out as much information as you can about anything and/or anyone in the room.”

    The result: Utter Failure!

    He can tell you: This guy was drinking too much, that gal has too much makeup…all and all a collective of superficial notes, you should have sent in a video camera for all that matter!

    Send a woman in…Aha, Success!

    She comes back with a boat load of info: She is divorced and looking, he has 3 kids at colleges, she makes a wonderful angle cake (got the recipe)…All relevant data to any person in the whole room!

    So what is the magical secret that woman have and men don’t?

    • Women dive in the conversation: They spare no one that catches their knowing eyes; all the while men measure up their targets (funny phrase; but true), count their words before saying them and lastly: are too taken back by the thought of rejection to even start a talk!
    • Women use Open-End comments: When a man comments on something he would say: Great, Nice…; a woman on the other hand makes it a hidden question: I loved it; how did you get the idea?
    • They are more colorful with the choice of words: Adore instead of Like, Individual instead of Person,
    • They make the other party think he/she knows more than them: Thereby expanding their comfort zone and allowing them to keep on talking.
    • Women eavesdrop without knowing it: Must been a built-in ability on the female side because according to them men have trouble even hearing most of their talk.
    • They have good closure of any chat:Do not forget to call me if you need help with that

    As for the “Joy” part of having a talk, according to study by Psychologist Matthias Mehl,  an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Arizona: Those who reported the higher levels of well-being spent less time alone and more time talking to others. When he compared the unhappiest participants with the happiest, he found the happiest spent about 25 percent less time alone. They also spent about 70 percent more time talking.

    Take that you silent – Unhappy – type;  listen to your woman while she chats and you might learn a thing or two, and be happier!

    © 2011, She Said. All rights reserved.

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    3 Responses to Ah…The Joys of her Chat!

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    3. May 29, 2011 at 12:58 pm

      I learned from a friend way back in high school, that if you are interested in someone, whether you are a male or female, always make them feel like the most important person in the room. It became a valued nugget of information that served me well. Guys should try it, well that…and making eye contact. Those looks speak more than most words can. 🙂

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