Let’s talk about the good to start out with. I finally walked up to the counter and plopped down my $55 so I can be a member of this great club. They even took my picture and printed it on my new COSTCO membership card, and gave me the card while I waited. Well hells bells, I was already in hogs heaven, and I had not even started to shop yet. I could not wait to start shopping.
I have never seen so many samples in one store. I ate an entire lunch there, including dessert, without spending a dime. And, you could even go back for seconds or thirds, and they did not seem to mind one bit. I hit the free popcorn lady on three separate occasions, and she just smiled. So, if you really want to help the homeless out, purchase them a COSTCO membership, and they will never go hungry.
I headed over to the HEARING AID department. People have been complaining about my hearing for years. They all say, “When is the last time you had your hearing checked?” The honest answer to that question is, “Back in the Navy somewhere between 1961 and 1965”. Believe it or not, HEARING EXAMS ARE FREE AT COSTCO! I cancelled my appointment with a doctor, who was going to charge me $65 for an office visit to have my ears checked.
Then, I sauntered over to the PRESCRIPTION area. Just the word makes me feel a little ill. Since I am moving to Maui, I will no longer be able to get free samples from my doctor like I have been for the past seven years. So, we are trying some new prescriptions. The major one is for high blood pressure. When I first received the new RX, I went to WALMART and they told me it would be $72!!!! I always thought WALMART had the lowest prices for everything.
At COSTCO my high blood pressure medicine was not even $10! Go figure! That ends the “GOOD” part of my story. Now, the “BAD”.
I started walking around in circles, actually blocks, and realized I had been by the same display several times, and asked one of the COSTCO employees if they provided any type of layout map of their store. He smiled, and maybe even giggled a little, and said, “Oh no. We move everything around a lot just to keep it interesting. Like that display over there, was on the other side of the warehouse last night before I left my shift.” So, I just started walking up and down every isle in an orderly fashion, which is very difficult for me. My former wife of thirty-four years insists I have ADD, but I digress.
I am used to walking long distances for exercise, but I walked, looked, touched, squeezed, shook, tilted, and smelled hundreds of items from around 1:00PM until 4:00PM, and I had just made a dent in their warehouse. I did have a list of items I was looking for, but there was a “SLIGHT” problem.
And now the “UGLY” part of COSTCO if you are shopping for yourself. I only needed several paper cups to microwave my cheese and RO*TEL together, and then dip with chips. I’m drooling just thinking about them right now. OK Carole you win.
When I finally located the paper cups after asking directions twice, forgot the first response, I found that COSTCO sells PAPER CUPS in bags of 300! Three-hundred cups would last me for the next millennium if I managed to live that long. So, I went to WALMART to purchase my paper cups afterwards. I hoped I’d have better luck with the cheese and RO*TEL. But, I was wrong. The VELVEETA cheese is sold two boxes at a time, which was not too bad. But, the RO*TEL is wrapped in a box with SIX CANS! By the time I get around to can number six, the expiration date will have passed long before. All that remained was the chips.
I have never seen such a selection of chips. I wanted to get into the fetal position and call for my mommy! Organic, non-organic, seasoned organic, non-seasoned organic, flavored organic, non-flavored organic, white corn, yellow corn, and combination of white and yellow corn. Not only was the selection overwhelming, but the size of the bags is huge! The smallest one I could find, and purchased, was a 2.5 POUND, that’s 40 Ounces or 1.13 KG for all of you mathematicians and scientists.
I could throw a Super Bowl Party for my entire apartment complex, and still have plenty of leftover chips and especially RO*TEL.
© 2014, Pierre Cassidy. All rights reserved.